Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Second round picks

Well, I was 7 for 8 with my first round picks in the NHL playoffs. Let's see how well I do in the second round:

  • Buffalo over the Rangers
  • Ottawa over New Jersey -- have to say I'm not sure about this one. Ottawa won their first round series in 4, so they've been sitting and waiting for a week, while New Jersey had a hard-fought series against Tampa Bay, and might be riding some momentum. Maybe I should just predict that this series will go 6 or 7 and not actually pick a winner.
  • Detroit over San Jose
  • Anaheim over Vancouver

Monday, April 23, 2007

Nicky's job

Part of a conversation Gail and I had with Ryan and Nicholas the other day:

Gail: We're the parents. It's our job to keep you guys safe, to protect you. It's also our job to teach you to be nice, polite, helpful, to help you learn, give you food and clothes, a place to sleep....
Ryan: Drive us to school?
Gail: Yes, that's another one. All of those things are part of our job as parents. Nicholas, what do you think your job is?

(Nicholas then rolled his eyes and gave a big sigh, as though he's given this same answer a hundred times before)

Nicholas: Remember my shoes.

Thursday, April 19, 2007

No spare tire, thanks very much

One year ago today, I started my weight loss program (blogged about it last year). I'm basically following the Weight Watchers program, without actually joining Weight Watchers. So far, it's been a big success. When I started (April 19, 2006), I weighed 175.5 pounds, and by August 9, I was down to 160 even. Since then, I've hovered between 160 and 165 (maxing out at 165.5 twice) &mdash this morning I weighed in (for the third consecutive week) at 163.5.

I'm still following the program, but I've upped my points to 28 per day, and I don't count points on weekends, though I try not to go too crazy. I've been doing that for about six months, and I've been maintaining pretty well.

I was never concerned about my weight until about 10 years ago. We were looking at some pictures of a recent trip to Collingwood with some friends. One of the friends was quite pregnant with her second child, and she joked about how her first child kept running up to her, pointing to her expanding tummy, and saying "baby". While looking at the pictures, we came across one of me in a particularly unflattering pose. Gail jokingly pointed at my tummy and said "baby". Now that I think about it, it would be really unlike Gail to say something like that, so perhaps it was someone else. Might even have been me. In any case, that's when I resolved (it was December at the time) to get into better shape. Shortly after Christmas that year, we bought a treadmill, and I started cutting out snacks and stuff. I went from my high of 188 pounds down to 163 in four months. In the next few months I went up to around 170, and then stayed around there for a few years, though it kept slowly creeping up until I hit 175 again, and then Easter happened last year.

My ultimate goal is to never hit 180 pounds again. Right now, I would consider even getting to 170 as failure. I realize that I am almost for... for... f... well, I'm in my late thirties, and things will likely change, but for now I'm still eating pretty well most of the time, working out two or three times a week, and playing baseball again this summer. I think I look OK, and I feel great, so my short-term goal is not to hit 170 pounds before I turn for... for... f... oh, you know.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Doyle vs. Benesch

The Rock have now gone a full season without Colin Doyle. Are they a better team without him? Well, no, but that may not be all his doing; they also lost Brad MacDonald and Brian Biesel, and then traded away Rusty Kruger and Phil Sanderson halfway through the season, and they also had a rookie coach. Benesch, Fines, and Thompson tallied more points in total than Doyle did, but does that mean the Rock really won the trade? Hard to say. Doyle played very well with San Jose, who kind of pulled a Raptors — they were really bad last year (5-11 and a distant 5th in the west), and worse the year before, but this year they're 9-7 and they made the playoffs for the first time in 3 years — and they didn't just squeak into the playoffs like the Rock did.

Ryan Benesch looks like the "real deal", winning Rookie of the Month for February, Rookie of the Week a couple of times, and is a serious contender for Rookie of the Year. He will be a great player in the NLL for years to come. But then again so will Doyle, who already is a great player in the NLL, and has been for years. Josh Sanderson's point total dropped by about 15 this year — he seemed to enjoy passing to Doyle who would just power through the middle of the defense. Blaine Manning doesn't do that as much (Manning is still a very good player, but he's just not the player he was a couple of years ago), and Benesch doesn't either, but man, does that kid have some moves. Aaron Wilson also continues to improve, and no longer just waits around the left side of the net for someone to pass it to him; he can score from anywhere.

So with all of these kids doing well, plus veterans like Veltman and Driscoll (one of the best all-round players on the team, IMHO) around, and the ultimate clutch goalie Bob Watson in net, do the Rock stand a chance against the 14-2 Rochester Knighthawks this weekend? Nope. I really hope I'm wrong, but I think they're gonna get smoked.

Philadelphia is in a rebuilding phase right now — just look at the kids they have on their roster: Athan Ianucci, Geoff Snider (holy crap, is he ever good at faceoffs), Kyle Wailes, Ian Llord, Sean Greenhalgh, and Rob Van Beek — and their goalie Matt Roik is almost 10 years younger than Watson. They might have sucked just as much as Toronto this year (they ended up with the same record of 6-10), but let's see how the Wings are doing, say, two or three years from now, once all those kids have a few years under their belt. Compare that to the aging Rock, who will have to deal with the inevitable retirement (or at least decline) of Veltman, Watson, Ladouceur, and Driscoll. Wilson and Benesch have many great years ahead of them, and I believe the Rock got a first rounder for Phil Sanderson, but that's a lot of people (and talent) to replace.

Friday, April 13, 2007

First Round Picks

I looked at the hockey scores this morning and found that the winners of all four games last night were who I picked to win their respective series. Then I realized that nobody knew this because I hadn't posted my picks! So here I go:

  • Buffalo over the Islanders
  • New Jersey over Tampa Bay
  • The Rangers over Atlanta
  • Ottawa over Pittsburgh -- though I don't think I'd want to play Pittsburgh in next year's playoffs.
  • Dallas Detroit over Calgary
  • Anaheim over Minnesota
  • Vancouver over Dallas
  • Nashville over San Jose

I'll make my second round picks once the first round is done, but right now, I'm picking Buffalo over Detroit in the Cup final.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Wii!

I have been looking for a Wii for several Wiiks (everyone reading this is thinking "Oh, please don't start with the Wii jokes, they are Wii-lly annoying") months now, and have had no luck. I've called numerous stores numerous times, and they're always sold out, and nobody knows when they're getting any more. The other day, a guy at work, aListair (he always capitalizes the L) emailed me that the EB Games near him had a couple of consoles, and would I like for him to grab me one. Rather than asking where it was and getting off my lazy ass and going there myself, I just said sure and let him do my legwork for me. He went on his way to work, and came by my office yesterday morning with a Wii console. You da man aListair!

I set it up last night (no internet yet, maybe this weekend), and played a few games after the kids went to bed (by the time I got it set up, it was bedtime; it's not like I waited until they were in bed). I bought Wii Play on the way home, which is $59, but comes with a free controller! Well, it turns out that a more accurate description would be that it's a $49 controller that comes with a $10 game. The game itself is pretty good for practicing using the remote, but not much else. Wii Sports is much better — it turns out that I'm a bowling expert. Who knew? I figured out quickly that because of the way I throw it, the ball always spins to the left, so I managed to compensate for that, and did pretty well. I didn't manage to figure out why it goes to the left in the first place, but as long as you can compensate for it, it doesn't much matter. Hey, that's the same as my golf game!

We also rented some games from Blockbuster — Cars and Super Paper Mario. I never managed to figure Cars out, but I thought about it later, and I think you have to turn the remote sideways. I looked at Super Paper Mario as well, but the opening sequence (telling you the story) is, as aListair put it "very very very very very very verbose", so after a while I just went back to Wii Sports.

This morning, I read an article on how the Wii shortage "could last months". Thanks again aListair!

Monday, April 09, 2007

Speling - its important

I'm an English pedant. It annoys me when I read stuff that contains spelling, grammatical, or even punctuation mistakes. Here is an article about proper punctuation, and here is one about grammatical mistakes. The second one contains all kinds of things that annoy me: "would of" instead of "would have", "your" instead of "you're", and "it's instead of its" ("it's" is short for "it is" &mdash it's as simple as that).

A former boss of mine, Ed, used to say "irre-dis-regardless" instead of "regardless". He was a very clever and funny guy, so I am quite sure he was kidding around, and didn't actually believe that was a real word. We had a tool called "FIST", which was short for "FIle STorage", and one of my co-workers joked about the fact that "fist" sounded similar to the Polish word for (I think) potato. Ed, who was of Spanish descent, thought for a second and then told us that the closest you'd get in Spanish is "There was a bug but I fist it". (Say that quote with a strong Speedy Gonzalez accent to get the full effect.)

Now that I think about it, the FIST tool was the source of another joke. FIST had both a client component ("front-end") and a server component ("back-end"). One of our co-workers was in charge of the server component, and one day when he was working from home, someone asked where he was; the answer was that he was at home, doing the back-end FIST thing. Purely unintentional, but we all laughed for hours.

Thursday, April 05, 2007

Mean people suck

Every now and again, you hear stories about people that give you a good feeling about people in general. You can call it faith in the goodness of mankind. My wife calls it a "warm fuzzy". You know, the people who find a bag full of money and find out where it came from and return it untouched, or donate a kidney to someone they barely know. Last Christmas, my wife went through the Tim Horton's drive-thru one morning and when she got to the window, she told the cashier that she wanted to pay for the person behind her (who she didn't know). It only cost her a couple of bucks, but she felt great for days.

And then there are these losers.

There's a guy in the office whose teenage son has cerebal palsy, and is confined to a wheelchair. As a way for his son, who cannot hold a regular job, to make a little bit of money, his father has a snack tray in the kitchen, with chocolate bars and chips and such for a buck each, and a little tin to collect the money. The snack tray has been there for a number of years. In the last week or so, he's had to move the tray to a table outside his office, because things are being stolen from the tray. He's now got a sign in the kitchen where the tray used to be saying "If you want to steal from me, come to my office and pick my pocket, and leave my son alone." I was hoping that it was someone who wanted a snack but didn't have the money at the time, and they figured they'd pay for it the next day — I have done this in the past (though I always leave a little signed IOU note), but apparently this was not an isolated incident, it's happened a number of times.

I put a case of chocolate bars and boxes of chocolate pieces in the kitchen the other day as part of a fundraiser for my kids' school, along with an envelope for the money. I dropped by the kitchen just a couple of hours later, and found that a box has been opened. What kind of person would just help themself? (Note: I also found at the end of the day that there was one dollar more in the envelope than I was expecting based on what was sold. Could be that the guilty party figured that they ate 1/3 of the box, so they left 1/3 of the cost. However, I did not list that as an option on the envelope — a box is $3, either you buy it or you don't.)

My kids' school held a silent auction in February to raise money for the science programs in the school. Local businesses donated items, gift certificates, etc. that were then auctioned off, and all the money raised went to the school. The minimum bid for each item was 1/3 of the item's value, and obviously the highest bid at the end of the night won the item. My wife is the chair of the school council, which ran the event, and she told me about some of the goings-on:

  • Several people scratched out the minimum bid and bid something less. In at least one case, nobody else bid on the item, and the bidder expected to get the item for less than the minimum. When told she'd have to pay the minimum, she refused (though her father was standing right there and he offered to pay the minimum).
  • One person (might have been the same person as in the first point) bid on a bunch of things and won several of them. When told what items she had won, she said that she didn't expect to win that many, and that she didn't want them all.
  • One item wasn't being bid on, so the principal of the school announced over the PA that she was lowering the minimum bid. I might add here that the school is benefitting from the event, but it was being run by the school council, and so the principal had no authority to do this.
  • There were two people (I'll call them A and B) bidding for one item, and they almost came to blows. Each accused the other of "cheating" - A said that B essentially hip-checked her out of the way to get to the bid sheet, and B said that she couldn't get to the bid sheet because A's husband physically blocked her. This did not get solved until several days after the event. Person B left us a very long voicemail message describing her view, and threatened to not attend anymore school fundraisers (effectively punishing the school) unless she got the item. Person A, who had ended up with the item after the auction, decided that it wasn't worth the fight and gave it to B. Strangely, the item was a gift certificate for the place where person A worked.

Mean people suck.

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

More separated at birth

Toronto Rock forward
Josh Sanderson
Tobey Maguire, aka Spiderman

Monday, April 02, 2007

Baseball season and the Rock thump the Wings

Baseball season began yesterday! The Jays start their season today against the Tigers, and I'm pretty excited. The Jays had a pretty good season last year, finishing second in the AL East, and big things are expected this year as well. Well, hopefully, anyway. They added Frank Thomas and Matt Stairs to the lineup, increasing the offensive potency of an already-potent lineup. I think that having Vernon Wells sign a multi-year million billion gazillion dollar contract helped to convince them that the Jays were serious. Adding Royce Clayton at short won't make a huge difference, but it certainly won't hurt. I was kind of hoping that J.P. Ricciardi would add a stud arm to the pitching rotation during the off-season, or at least someone to replace Ted Lilly. He didn't, but Josh Towers looked more in spring training like the pretty good Josh Towers from two years ago than the woefully sucky Josh Towers who went something like 2-10 last year, and free agents Victor Zambrano and Tomo Okha look like pretty good signings. Last year, A.J. Burnett occasionally looked unhittable, but sometimes was quite hittable, so if he has more outings in the former category and less in the latter, he'll be fine, and if Gustavo Chacin can get over last year's injuries (though he had a lousy spring), the pitching staff should be no worse than last year, and possibly better.

In lacrosse news, the Rock have been playing downright lousy for most of this year, losing games to both New York and Edmonton, who are a combined 8-18. They are not only in danger of missing the playoffs for the first time in history (they missed the playoffs in their first season as the Ontario Raiders, but haven't since they moved to Toronto in 1999), but are also in danger, at 6-7, of finishing below .500 for the first time in history (they were 8-8 last year). However, when they played Philadelphia last Friday night, you'd never have known any of that. They kept the Wings scoreless in the entire first half (unheard of in lacrosse), and went on to win 15-6. Watson was very good in the first half, and amazing in the second, the defense was solid, and the offense was clicking. Ryan Benesch scored four goals for the third straight game, and is starting to make people forget Colin Doyle, though it's probably too early to say that. Doyle was not only a scoring machine, but he made the players he played with better as well -- look at Josh Sanderson and Blaine Manning. Sanderson has been fine this year, but Manning has been remarkably average, and is on pace to end up with less points than last year, which was down from the previous year. I can't imagine a player as good as he is (was?) has peaked at the age of 26, but he hasn't been injured or anything, so I can't explain it.

The Leafs are close to backing their way into the playoffs and I'm not sure how I feel about this. On one hand, once they're in the playoffs, who knows what could happen (see Edmonton last year), but on the other hand, reality hits — the Leafs are simply not going to win the Cup this year (not that I didn't know that months ago). I remember thinking last year that if the Leafs don't make the playoffs, that'll send a message to management, who might make some serious changes to the team, rebuilding for the future. In that sense, not making the playoffs would be the best thing that could happen. They didn't make the playoffs last year, but management didn't do the necessary dump-and-rebuild, so we're in the same boat this year. If they don't make the playoffs this year, I have no confidence that the necessary changes will be made (i.e. trade all the big names, load up on draft picks and young kids, etc.), so we'll be in the same boat again next year, and the year after that, and the year after that... Given that, may as well squeak into the playoffs this year and hope for the best.

Friday, March 23, 2007

Trouble with the mixtlflap?

My car's in the shop right now — it started hesitating and even stalling every now and again (while driving) last weekend, and yesterday morning, I couldn't keep the engine running for more than a few seconds. Earlier this week, I had it into Canadian Tire three times — the first time, they guessed at something and replaced it ($90), this has no effect. The second time it sat in the parking lot all day because their scope wasn't working, and the third time they tried to hook it up to their newly-fixed scope, but it still wasn't working. On Thursday when I couldn't start it, I had it towed to the garage across the street (Al's Auto Service).

At the end of the day, I still hadn't heard back from Al, so I called to check on the status. He said that he had had it out earlier, and it ran fine, so he didn't yet know. I had to come into work today for a conference call, and Gail's away, so I had to rent a car (more on that later). I didn't know when I would be able to return the rental, so I asked Al if they were open on Saturday, and he actually laughed out loud at the thought of coming in to work on my car on a Saturday.

When I got home from work today, I finally heard back. They have no idea what the problem was, but it seems to be fixed now. He said they unplugged a bunch of things and plugged them back in, so it's possible that one of those connections was loose and is now OK. It's also possible that the problem has simply gone away temporarily, and it will stall on the way to work on Monday. Time will tell.

This is when I hate the fact that I know jack about cars. I can change my own air filter and windshield wipers, but that's about it. I have a vague idea on how the things work, but there are so many parts that I don't understand that I am always afraid I'm going to get taken to the cleaners when I go to the garage. I'm worried that I'll hear "We found the problem — your mixtlflap is burnt out. It'll be $850 to replace, plus two hours of labour. Replacing the mixtlflap is a serious thing, since you have to remove the flurbnarg first, and you know how hard that is." Sure I do, that's the thing that's right next to the flux capacitor, isn't it?

The car I rented is a Kia Rio. I'm actually more impressed with it than I thought I'd be. It's reasonably comfortable (at least as comfortable as my Sunfire), handles pretty well (it's quite small), and goes pretty fast. I looked at the speedometer at one point today and was surprised to find that I was doing 130 — I normally keep it around 110-115. It doesn't accelerate as fast as my Sunfire (which isn't all that fast itself), and acceleration is very loud, but once you're at cruising speed (or above!), it's very quiet. I haven't even looked at the trunk, but I suspect it doesn't hold very much, and the space in the back is fine for the kids, but I think that adults would find it rather cramped back there. But it has heated seats (or as I told Gail yesterday "seated heats"), a CD/MP3 player, power locks and windows, and remote keyless entry. Not bad for a car that starts at only $13,595.

Music quiz

Here's a little music quiz. See if you can name the band:

  • They were very big in the 70's and early 80's
  • Many of their songs are staples on classic rock radio
  • Three-piece band, based in the UK
  • The lead singer quit the band in the 80's and went on to a solo career
  • Originally his music was fairly similar to that of the band, but he gradually went more and more towards soft rock (to the point where classic rock stations that play the band's music won't play his solo stuff)
  • He worked on at least one movie soundtrack
  • One other member of the band had some success on his own, the third one vanished
  • The band recently reformed, and is now touring again

Obviously the answer is The Police, right? Wrong. Well, they fit all the criteria above, but the answer is Genesis. Phil Collins and Sting both went soft and started making some pretty lame music, Mike Rutherford of Genesis had some success with Mike and the Mechanics, and Stewart Copeland did quite well doing music for numerous movies and TV shows. Tony Banks and Andy Summers did nothing that I know of.

Weird how two completely different bands have so many similarities. I'd love to see the Police (though I'm not willing to pay the insane prices for tickets), though seeing Genesis doesn't really have that much appeal for me.

I was going to make a joke at the end of this posting, something like "Man, if only <band> would reform, that would be great!" where <band> was some band that was big in the 70's or 80's but then broke up, but I can't make such a joke, because I think all of the bands from that era already have reformed. Max Webster? April Wine? The Doobie Brothers? Styx? The Eagles? Yup, all within the last few years. REO Speedwagon? The Police? Genesis? Yup, they're touring now. Journey? Duran Duran? The Bay City Rollers? KC and the Sunshine Band? The Village People? Yup, according to Wikipedia, they're all touring now. Hmmmmmm... running out of bands.... hey, I know one!

Man, if only the Beatles would reform, that would be great!

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Weirdest spam ever

I just got the weirdest spam message ever:

Subject: anti-spammers are lamers
From: Marilyn Rice [weirdingdweller's@iguanalover.com]

subj

regards, spammer.


The hell?

Belak and Janssen

So the Leafs have been saying for days that they were not looking for revenge against Cam Janssen for his late cheap-shot hit against Tomas Kaberle a couple of weeks ago. I heard interviews with numerous players, including Kaberle (who got a concussion on the hit and hasn't played since), and they all said the same thing - they're not thinking about revenge at all, they just want to worry about winning — the two points are more important than getting back at Cam Janssen. So what happens? Less than ten minutes into the game, Wade Belak goes after Janssen and fights him, and then all the players congratulate him after the fight, and after the game, they talk about what a great thing he did. What happened to "we're not thinking about revenge?"

And they wonder why people who don't follow hockey all that closely think that hockey players are a bunch of thugs, and that hockey is a violent game.

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

NetWare hell

Novell announced the other day that their next version of SuSE Linux (called Open Enterprise Server) will be able to run NetWare 6.5 as, essentially, a virtual machine. It also says that "This release of OES also spells the end of NetWare as a separate operating system", so that you will only be able to run NetWare as a VM.

SQL Anywhere has been supported on NetWare since the beginning, and I have been the sole NetWare developer on the engine team for most of the last ten years. With this change, I don't know if it makes sense to continue supporting NetWare, so it's possible that management will consider dropping NetWare as a supported platform. This would be fine with me, since NetWare is a difficult operating system to work with — the compiler is old and unsupported, the debugger is flaky and slow, and there are lots of idiosyncrasies specific to NetWare that I have to deal with.

The title of the above linked article is "Good-bye NetWare, hello, OES 2", so when viewing that page in Firefox, that's what the title bar says. When I minimized the Firefox window, I got this, which I thought was kind of appropriate:

Saturday, March 10, 2007

Perl vs. Python

I'm not one to generally get involved in technical "religious" wars — vi vs. emacs, perl vs. python, Windows vs. Mac, etc. Each one has its advantages and disadvantages, and I have my preferences, but arguing about them is rarely productive. Having said that, there were a few comments on my previous (and completely unrelated) entry that raised the perl vs. python argument. I don't think perl is inherently unreadable, and it's certainly possible to write easy-to-read, coherent perl code, but in general, I tend to agree with Tom.

I am a professional software developer, and have been since my first co-op work term in 1988. (Aside: so is MC, and he's been doing this longer than I have.) I have written code in many different languages, including C, C++, Objective-C, perl, python, Java, REXX, Basic, PHP, Tcl, Lua, plus a few at university that I barely remember: Fortran, COBOL, Ada, Lisp, Prolog. Of these, the ones I use regularly in my job are C, C++, perl, and python. I know C and C++ inside out and backwards, but when I am writing any significant code in perl (i.e. more than a handful of lines), I almost always have the perl online documentation open in another window — that's not always true for python, and I've been writing perl code years longer than I've been writing python. I don't think that the perl code that I write is more complex than the python code, but the python syntax just seems more intuitive.

Say I have a list of filenames to process. In python:

files = [ 'file1', 'file2', 'file3', 'file4' ]
for i in files:
    # do something with i
Fairly straightforward. In perl:
my @files = qw( file1 file2 file3 file4 );
my $i;
for $i ( @files ) {
    # do something with $i
}
A little weird (what the heck does "qw" mean?), but not too bad. You could also use
my @files = ( 'file1', 'file2', 'file3', 'file4' );
which is a little more intuitive, though I had to check the perl docs to see whether to use parens or curly brackets.

A note before I go any further — in perl, there are a zillion ways of doing anything, so the code examples I'm listing here may not be the simplest way to do things. This, in itself, is part of my problem with perl — after ten years of writing perl, I should know how to do a lot of these relatively basic things, but without checking the documentation or an existing perl script, I frequently find that I don't. I've only been writing python for about 5 years, and I seem to remember its syntax and the majority of the language weirdnesses a lot more easily than perl.

OK, now, what if you want to add something to the list later? Python:

files.append( 'file5' )

Obviously, if you want to add to the end of a list, you "append" to it. Very intuitive. In perl? Well, I'm not sure. I'm currently looking through the perl documentation, and it's not obvious how to add an element to a list. I'm sure there's a way — maybe $foo += 'file5'; or $foo .= 'file5';. Maybe it's a documentation issue and not a language issue, but whatever way it is, it ain't obvious.

Another thing that confuses me about perl is there are a number of different "types" (scalars, arrays, and hashes), and you can seemingly convert one to the other whenever you want, and sometimes when you don't want. First of all, is a "list" the same as an array, or is it a special type of scalar? I don't know. Here's how to set up an array in perl:

@foo = ( 'a', 'b', 'c' );

Now, given that @foo = ( 'a', 'b', 'c' );, it would seem logical to me that the following two lines do the same thing:

$foo = ( 'a', 'b', 'c' );
$foo = @foo;

However, they don't. The first one takes the last element of the array and assigns it to $foo. (What happens to the rest of the array? And why would you do this?). The second, incredibly, assigns the length of @foo to $foo. If I want the length of an array, wouldn't it be more logical to say something like "foo = length( array )" (which, coincidentally, is the proper python syntax)?

This posting was not meant as a "perl sucks, python rules" rant. In fact, I don't think that at all. Perl is an exceptionally powerful language, and I do enjoy writing perl code. In particular, if I'm doing anything involving regular expressions or string manipulation, perl kicks python's ass all over the place. However, perl does not have the most intuitive syntax, and you can write completely unintelligible "Martian code" very easily in perl. There's even an online contest called Perl Golf to see who can write the smallest possible perl program to do a particular task — entries to this contest sometimes contain less than 50 bytes. Good luck writing anything remotely useful in python in less than 50 bytes. In addition, python requires correct use of whitespace to control program flow. Now, when I first learned this, my initial thought was "How stupid is that?", but I've since found that as long as you have a python-aware editor (emacs works nicely for me), this is not a big deal. The only drawback is that if you want to remove an entire section of code, you can't just put if( 0 ) { at the top and } at the bottom like you can in perl, C, or C++. Well, you can add if 0: at the top, but then you have to re-indent the entire block you want to remove. Again, with the right editor, this isn't a huge deal.

Bottom line: perl and python are both great languages, but I have found that the perl syntax is less intuitive and therefore harder to remember than python. Thus, I have more trouble reading old perl code than old python code.

Note: I'm going away on vacation tomorrow for a week, so if you add a comment to this post and I don't respond, I'm not ignoring you. I won't be back online until at least next Sunday (the 18th).

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Channelling Andy Rooney

Have you ever noticed that when you make a phone call to a local number but dial a 1 first (as if it were a long-distance call), you get a message saying that you don't need to dial the 1, but then you have to hang up and dial again? Similarly, if you dial a number without a 1 that is long distance, you get a message saying that it's long distance and you need to dial a 1. But in both cases, your call does not go through. Why the hell not? If they want to give me a nastygram telling me what I should or should not have done, fine, but then put the damn call through. The technology exists. It's not rocket science. That's what happens on a cell phone, so why can't they do it on a land line?

The other day, I was making some phone calls at work to local businesses in the K-W area. Since I don't live in K-W, I don't know where I can call locally and where is long-distance, so in a few cases, I added a 1 when I didn't need to. Every time, I got the "You don't need to dial a 1" message, so I had to hang up and re-dial the number without the 1. Very frustrating.

When I call home with my cell phone, the call display stores the number with a 1 for some reason. If I then display the number, click the "dial" button, and then pick up the receiver, it dials "1-905-...", and then I get the message saying I didn't need to dial the 1. At that point, I need to hang up and dial the number manually. For our cell phone numbers, that's no big deal, but if it was a different number that I don't have memorized, I have to write the number down on a piece of paper and then pick up the phone and dial it. So much for modern technology.

This posting is yet another example of the hard-hitting hold-no-punches journablogalism that you'll find on Cut The Chatter. See, Whimsley, I can invent words too! Though yours kind of rolls off the tongue better than mine does.

Aside: Can you "channel" someone who's not dead?

Update: Just to prove that I invented this word myself:

Sunday, March 04, 2007

"Best Buy" may not be

Best Buy has admitted having an intranet web site that is identical to the public web site, except that the prices aren't always the same. Apparently the idea is that customers would come into the store asking about an item at a certain price, and the employees would then check the "web site", showing the customer that the price has gone up. I have heard numerous complaints about Best Buy — not just that their salespeople are pushy (that's true at a lot of places), but that they try to cheat customers and dupe them into paying higher prices. I've only been in Best Buy once, looking for something specific (don't even remember what it was), and I didn't buy whatever it was there, but because of all these stories I've heard in the past, I have been hesitant to shop there. After this latest one, they're on my "boycott" list. Not that I really had a boycott list before (I can't think of any other stores that I absolutely refuse to go to), but I have one now, and Best Buy's on it. This is a little unfortunate, since I'm in the market for a Wii, and they're rather hard to find. Removing one store from my list of possibilities will make it even harder to find, but, you know, standing up for your principles and all that.

Yappa Ding Ding wrote the other day about problems she had recently with Dell's website. This is unfortunate, since we're considering buying a new computer in the near future, and I was going to check out dell.ca. I probably still will, but I will be much more defensive if I end up having to speak with a salescritter.

Friday, March 02, 2007

The Observer Effect

We had a "parent observation day" in Nicholas' kindergarten class today. This is when a few parents sit in on the class for a while (90 minutes), and just observe (a) how the class runs, and (b) how their child behaves while in class. We were not supposed to assist him at all, we were just supposed to sit and watch. Of course, Nicky was an angel while we were there. We sat and watched him sit and read with two other kids with minimal incident — one of the kids wouldn't let Nicky hold the book, and rather than yelling and hitting (which he would do with Ryan), he calmly told the teacher what was happening. Nicky loves to throw stuff — I doubt he could go an hour and a half at home without throwing something, unless he's asleep or watching Scooby-Doo on TV, but he didn't throw anything the entire time we were there. Just before we left, his teacher came over and told us that Nicky was having "a stellar day".

This would seem to me to be a prime example of the Observer Effect, where the act of observing something changes it. (I have referred to this in the past as the "Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle", but according to Wikipedia, this is incorrect.) Nicky knew we were in the corner watching, so he behaved better than he might have otherwise. The only way around this would be to install a video camera somewhere where the kids wouldn't see it, don't tell them about it, and watch the whole thing from another room. But then some parents would go all "civil rights" and "Big Brother" on us and sue the school for mental anguish or some bullshit like that.

Of course, it's possible that I'm not giving Nicky enough credit — we all have our good and bad days, and perhaps he's just having a good day. He did get a lot of sleep last night, and ate a fair-sized breakfast, and we did get to watch in the morning before he gets tired, so maybe our presence didn't have that much of an effect.

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Trade Deadline

Today is the trade deadline in the NHL, so teams have until 3:00 this afternoon to decide whether they are going to make a run at the playoffs, or trade away players that will become free agents at the end of the season, thereby getting something for them, instead of getting zilch later. This, traditionally, is the most frustrating day of the season for Leafs fans. This is the day when the Leafs management decides that they are going to take a run at the playoffs, so they need some kind of veteran help, and they trade away prospects and/or draft picks for someone past his prime. This year, there have been rumours of Gary Roberts returning to Toronto, and I love Roberts as a player, but the Leafs need to realize that they have no chance of winning the Cup this year, so adding someone like Roberts would serve no purpose.

There are also rumours about the Leafs getting Bill Guerin, but to do that, they'd have to give up — guess what? — prospects and draft picks. Once again, if this happens, the Leafs will be trading away their future for a hopeless shot at winning the Cup this year. All that giving up the prospects and picks will do is guarantee that the Leafs will be in the same situation next year, and the year after that, and the year after that...

I've said it before and I'll say it again — the Leafs need to blow up the team and start over. Signing the formerly somewhat-overrated and now vastly overpaid Bryan McCabe was a mistake. I like Kaberle, so I don't have a big problem with signing him long-term (especially since he's not getting McCabe-type money), and they just re-signed Darcy Tucker, but for only $3 million a year, so that's not bad at all. I love Sundin, but I think they need to trade him now, while they can still get something for him, and start stocking up on the aforementioned prospects and draft picks, rather than trading them away.

Heard on the radio this morning — the Leafs would like to trade Pavel Kubina back to Tampa. They don't want anything back for him; they'd just send him back to Tampa, with a note saying "My bad". :-)

I've only been really following basketball for a year or two, but it seems that Raptors GM Bryan Colangelo is very well respected in the league, and with good reason — in less than a year, he's turned the Raptors from a laughing stock into a conference-contending team. They're not likely to win a championship this year, but they could be a serious contender within the next few years. Whenever I hear him being interviewed, he gives an air of not just confidence, but control. He is in complete control of the team, and has a plan for it. When I hear the GM of the Blue Jays, J.P. Ricciardi, talk, he gives me the same impression. The Leafs GM, John Ferguson, however, always gives me the impression that he's doing whatever he can to just stop the bleeding. He's not trying to make the team tangibly better, he's just trying to keep it from getting too much worse. Unless the Leafs turn it around in a big way this season (i.e. make the playoffs and win at least one round), they really need to get rid of Ferguson.

Update: The Leafs made one deal today — trading away 23-year-old prospect Brendan Bell and a draft pick for 35-year-old veteran Yanic Perreault. Same ol' same ol'. Sigh.

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Science vs. Faith

Click.

The calliope crashed to the ground

I just bought The Essential Bruce Springsteen from amazon.ca — $20 for a triple CD! There's a lot of great stuff on here, though I get the impression that I'm going to listen to disk one a lot more than the other two. The first song is 1973's "Blinded by the Light", which was covered by Manfred Mann's Earth Band in 1977. The Springsteen version is very upbeat, almost dance-able, but the lyrics are frequently indecipherable. The Manfred Mann version is much better known, and is a little more "interesting", in that there are more speed changes, guitar licks, and keyboard fills. The lyrics are obviously the same, but I can understand them a little better (in that I can hear the words - I have no idea what the song actually means). I've always loved the Manfred Mann version — this is one of the fairly rare times that I prefer the remake of a song to the original.

I've always been impressed with people who are creative, like songwriters and artists and such. I can't draw worth a damn, but I'd love to be able to. Gail says that writing software is creative, and I suppose it is (you could even consider it an "art" if you try), but it's not the same thing. I can play the guitar, but creating music rather than playing something that someone else wrote seems much harder. Just as difficult, I would think, is the ability to take a song that someone else wrote and re-work it, as Manfred Mann did on this song, or as Joe Cocker did on his version of the Beatles' "With A Little Help From My Friends". It's kind of hard to believe that this is the same guy that wrote recorded the bubblegum "Doo Wah Diddy Diddy" twelve years before (according to Wikipedia, Manfred Mann didn't write that song either).

Sunday, February 18, 2007

You Suck

Went to the third Toronto Rock home game of the season tonight. They played pretty sloppy, and Watson was kind of shaky in the first half. They were down 8-3 at one point and went into halftime losing 8-4, but rookie coach Glenn Clark must have given them some kind of pep talk at halftime. They didn't exactly come out in the 3rd quarter guns-a-blazin', but they did score 4 goals in the third to tie it up. Whipper, and the defense in general, was much better in the second half, only allowing two goals, and the Rock won it 11-10. I love those Rock comeback wins — they had a couple of games last year, both against Philadelphia if I'm not mistaken, where they came back from 8-goal deficits to win the game.

One thing you see (well, hear) at lacrosse games that you don't hear anywhere else (at least, I never have) is the "Sucks" cheer. When the opposing goalie allows a goal, a bunch of people stand up, point to the goalie, chant his name three times, and then yell "YOU SUCK!". The Chicago goalie was Brandon Miller, so tonight's chant went "MILL-er, MILL-er, MILL-er, YOU SUCK!" I suppose it's a little juvenile, but it's all in good fun (otherwise you wouldn't yell it when a goalie allows his fourth goal while your own team's goalie has already allowed eight).

The fans in Philadelphia go one better — in Philly, everyone on the opposing team sucks. Before the game starts, they announce the starting line-ups for each team (don't know why they don't announce the starting lineup for the opponents in Toronto), and after every opposing player's name, the fans yell "SUCKS!" Some players, notably Portland goaltender Dallas Eliuk who played 15 seasons in Philadelphia, hear the "SUCKS!" cheer following their name, immediately followed by applause.

Note: I created all of the Wikipedia pages I linked to above.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

The CENSORED Monologues

The popular play "The Vagina Monologues" ran into some trouble recently (I think this was in Florida somewhere, but I can't find the link), when a woman driving her niece by the theater was "offended" when the young girl (don't know how old she was) read the marquee and asked what a vagina was. She complained to the theatre, and they changed the marquee to read The "Hoohaa" Monologues (including the quotation marks). How stupid is this? It's not like "vagina" is some vulgar or dirty or even slang word. I know that if my son read a marquee that said The Vagina Monologues, he would probably just ignore it. If, however, he read The "Hoohaa" Monologues, he'd laugh at it and make a big fuss, and ask what a "Hoohaa" is. He already knows what a vagina is (well, I'm not sure he knows what one is, but he knows that girls have one and boys don't, and he doesn't consider the word dirty or taboo or anything), but I know that he'd never let go of the word "hoohaa", and we'd be hearing it all the time. In any case, any child old enough to read the word vagina is old enough to be told what it is and that it's not a dirty word.

This reminds me of one of my favourite "my kid is so cute" stories, from when Ryan was just two years old. Gail and I were going out, and we got a babysitter for Ryan (Nicky wasn't even born yet, so Ryan was definitely two). He was sitting at the table finishing his dinner, and Lindsay the babysitter came in and sat down next to him. She said hi, and he put down his fork, looked at her silently for a couple of seconds, and then said matter-of-factly, "You don't have a penis." Lindsay, to her credit, didn't even flinch, but confirmed his suspicion. He nodded and went back to his dinner, apparently satisfied with her response.

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Daddy, what's public key cryptography?

I was working on an HTTPS issue today, and Ryan came to talk to me. While he was watching, I figured out what was causing the problem, which was related to the SSL handshake. Ryan asked about the handshake, and I tried to give him a laymans-terms overview of what it was. Before I started, I started to picture in my head what the conversation might be like:

Me: When an SSL connection is made...
Ryan: What's SSL?
Me: When you want a connection to be encrypted...
Ryan: What's "encrypted" mean?
Me: When two processes are talking...
Ryan: What's a "process"?
Me: <sigh>.

Here's how I described it:

Me: If I want to send a message to another computer, I write the message on a kind of postcard, with the address of the other computer on it, and then I send it. The postcard goes out, sometimes on a wire, in this case through the air –
Ryan: Like radio waves?
Me: Exactly. Then the other computer receives the postcard, checks the address, and figures that the postcard is for him. Then he reads the message. But, if there's another computer nearby, it can look at the postcard too, even though it's got someone else's address on it. So if I want to send a secret message to a computer that's my friend, I don't want that other computer to be able to read it. So, I take the data on the postcard, and mush* it all up, and change it, and make it look funny. My friend knows that it's mushed up, and it un-mushes it and gets the original secret message out. But the other computer doesn't know this, so it looks at the message and says "Huh? What's that mean?"
Ryan: <giggle>
Me: When we first start talking, I tell my friend "Hey, I'm going to mush up this data, and here's how I'm going to do it." and I give him some stuff that allows him to un-mush the message — that's called the "handshake".
Ryan: Like this? <shakes my hand>
Me: Yes, just like that. It's a way that two computers say "hello, I'm going to send you some mushed data, here's how to un-mush it".
Ryan: That's cool.

*Important note: Note that "mush" as used here rhymes with "bush" or "push", not "hush".

Then I gave him some examples of why you'd want to do this — when I order a book from amazon.com (I thought of this because I pre-ordered the 7th Harry Potter book today), I give them my credit card number. I don't want someone else to figure out my credit card number, or they might go to amazon.com and say "Hi amazon.com, it's me, Graeme. I'd like to buy 500 books and charge it to this credit card", and he gets the books, and I have to pay for it. Ryan has a fairly limited sense of the value of money, but he gasped at this, obviously realizing that this would be a Bad Thing. Either that, or I just gave him a brilliant idea for how to get free stuff, and started him on his way to being a career criminal. Heh heh heh... oops.

Saturday, February 03, 2007

This shouldn't be happening yet!

Ryan was working on some homework the other day, and asked for some help. (He's in Grade 2.) He was doing some logic puzzles, which I used to love as a kid. The first one was: There are four birds sitting on a fence. Colour each of them according to these rules:

  1. The blue bird is not last
  2. The yellow bird is between the green bird and the blue bird
  3. The red bird is first

"OK, this is easy", I thought. Yellow is between green and blue, so we have GYB somewhere. Since blue is not last, it must be GYBR. But the last clue says that red is first, so it must be RGYB. But that makes blue last, so that's wrong too. I must have looked at this for a couple of minutes before telling Ryan that there must have been a typo somewhere, since the puzzle is not solvable. He skipped it and went on to the next one.

Later, I was going to show it to Gail, and make some kind of joke about the fact that they gave Ryan an impossible question to answer, when I noticed that the birds had all been coloured in. I looked at the colours, and smacked myself in the head for being so stupid. Of course the question was not impossible. When it said yellow is between green and blue, I assumed that meant GYB in that order — it actually meant BYG. Putting red first (as clue 3 dictates) gives you RBYG, which fits all the clues. Boy, did I feel like a moron.

I knew there would come a time when I would not be able to help Ryan with his homework. I just figured I had a couple more years....

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Stopping guestbook spam

My family web site has a guest book that a number of people, mostly family, have signed. Since I put it up a couple of years ago, I've gotten "guestbook spam" every now and again — messages sent by people we don't know, advertising their cheap V1@grA or whatever, though some just talk about what a great site it is, and how informative, and don't actually contain a link. I don't understand those ones, but whatever. Anyway, in the last few months, the number of spam entries I was getting increased astronomically, until a couple of weeks ago I started getting four or five of them a day. I wrote all the code for the website myself, and when someone adds a guestbook entry, I get sent an email containing who did it, when, and the text of the comment. When the spam started getting out of control, I changed it so that there's now a "delete this entry" link in the email. If I click the link, the entry gets deleted. Very easy, but still annoying.

I have no real idea how these messages were getting created, but I'm quite certain it wasn't someone actually sitting at a browser looking for guestbooks and adding entries when they find one. It had to be a bot of some kind. I figured that if I were writing a bot to do this, I might look at how the majority of guestbooks handle comments, and then write my bot accordingly. My guess was that they simply start requesting pages using POST, and sending "comment=<Some comment>&name=<Fake name>&email=<Fake email>" as the POST body. If it's a guestbook-type page, that may or may not enter a comment, and then the bot can move on to the next page. I suspected that the vast majority of guest books use "email" as the name of the email address field, "name" as the name field, and "comment" as the comment field, so I changed my page so that the names of these fields are hard-coded random strings. (If I wanted to, I could change it so that the strings are not hard-coded, but randomly generated at run-time, but that's just too much work.) The end result is that in the week since I made this change, I have not gotten a single spam entry in my guestbook.

It's certainly possible for a script to get the (HTML) source for a page, analyze it to find out what the actual field names are, and then submit spam entries that way, but I guess the bots aren't smart enough yet to do that. I'm sure it won't be long though...

Feb 5 update: Got two spam entries this morning. Oh well.

Saturday, January 27, 2007

Men's Day 2007

Friday was Men's Day at Devil's Glen Country Club, where Dave, my former boss and our VP of Engineering, has a chalet. They have Men's Day at the end of January every year, and Dave invites a bunch of us up. Once you buy your ticket ($140 this year), you get skiing for the day, breakfast and lunch, free beer and munchies (everything from wings and meatballs to oysters), plus gifts and lots of prize draws. The prizes are pretty substantial too — they had things like autographed Leafs and Raptors jerseys, BBQ's, ski equipment, other electronic devices, and then a few grand prizes, including a 50" plasma TV and a year's membership at a local golf course. One of the guys from our group won an Atomic ski bag and baseball cap. The gifts this year included a Devil's Glen baseball cap, a shirt (though they weren't ready in time and will be mailed out later), and one really strange one — a six-pack of beer.

The skiing was great. It was pretty cold in the morning (when we got up, Dave's weather station said it was -20), but it had warmed up to about -8 a few hours later. I think the cold temperatures must have scared some people off or kept them inside, because the hills were pretty empty. Good ski conditions + almost no lift lines = good skiing. I stuck to the easy and intermediate hills most of the day, though I did two or three black diamond ("expert") runs. I skipped the double diamond runs though, I just don't have the confidence in my skiing ability for those. I only ski once a year (though I missed it last year because I was sick), and my leg muscles are a little stiff today. There's normally a one-day grace period before the real pain sets in, so I'm not looking forward to tomorrow.

We all went up to Dave's chalet on the Thursday night to drink beer, play pool and table tennis, and hang out in the hot tub, but this year the big hit was the Nintendo Wii. Several of us had never seen one, and we all agreed that it's a really dumb name (though catchy), and we also all agreed that it was a lot of fun. We played a bunch of sports games — golf, tennis, baseball, bowling, and boxing. The graphics are no big deal (I think my several-year-old Nintendo 64 has better graphics), but the controller (the "Wii-mote") is the big draw. (I'm describing it here for those who have never used one &mdash feel free to skip this paragraph if you are familiar with the Wii.) It kind of looks like a (wireless) remote control with less buttons, but you basically use the remote like you would the golf club / baseball bat / tennis racquet / etc. It detects the motion (front-to-back, side-to-side, and even twisting) and speed, and the game acts accordingly. I was pretty impressed at the physics involved, and how they can sell this kind of technology for so little — if you can find one, I think they're under $300. My birthday's not until July, so maybe I should ask for one as a Valentine's Day present?

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Yet another Montana

We bought a new van last Friday. Well, leased, not bought. We leased a 2000 Pontiac Montana for three years, and then returned that and leased a 2003 Montana for four years, and that lease is coming due soon, but we're already over on the kilometers, so we went in early, chose our options, and signed on the dotted line. I like the van, and Gail loves it, so we had no problem getting another one. Since Gail works for EDS (which used to be owned by GM), she gets an employee discount, which we wouldn't get anywhere else, so we didn't even have to do any research. Every car we have ever had has been a GM product, and all but two have been Pontiacs: 1988 Cavalier Z24, 1996 Grand Prix, 1997 Saturn, 2000/2003/2007 Montanas, and 2004 Sunfire.

Interesting note: when looking for the link above, I originally went to pontiac.com, and found that in the US, the Montana is no longer available. They only have the Torrent (also available in Canada), which is more of an SUV, but no minivan. Too bad for Americans. Of course, they get the G6 convertible <drool /> which is not available in Canada.

When we got the 2003 van four years ago, we had big-time issues with the local Pontiac dealer — the sales guy was fine, but the leasing manager took a phone call from another customer while we were sitting in her office, and discussed his financial details (complete with down payment and monthly payment amounts) with him. When we asked if she had ever had customers in her office when talking to us on the phone, she didn't seem to understand why that would be a problem, but then said something to the effect of "No, I wouldn't do that to you guys", like the customer she was just talking to was somehow less important. We had other problems with her, and I ended up writing a letter to the president of the dealership, explaining the problems we had and telling him that we wouldn't be back. Well, I caved there since it's the closest Pontiac dealer, and it's just too inconvenient to go somewhere else (though not entirely - I bought the Sunfire two years ago at a dealership in Waterloo). But when I set up an appointment, they said that we'd be meeting with the same person as last time. I said "No we won't", and explained that we had had issues with her the last time. We arranged to meet with someone else, and I guess they went through our file and found my letter, and just fell over themselves telling us that they would do whatever it took to make us happy "this time". You know how it is — the squeaky wheel gets the grease.

Rock lose home opener

The Toronto Rock played their first home game of the season on Friday night, a 19-15 loss to Rochester. It was a pretty entertaining game, though the Rock took a lot of undisciplined penalties (and the officiating was pretty inconsistent all night). Rochester scored an unbelievable ten power play goals — the Rock offense wasn't bad (hey, they scored 15), but they just couldn't stay out of the box, so it seemed like they were a man down for two thirds of the game. You just can't win doing that. Hopefully new coach Clark can settle them down a bit for next week's game in Philadelphia, and if Jim Veltman is healthy enough to play, that will certainly help.

The loss of Colin Doyle wasn't a huge factor in this game. All three guys they got for him played — Benesch scored four goals and looked pretty good. Thompson wasn't much of a factor, and Fines scored a goal, though I didn't think he played very well. Despite getting pounded for 19 goals, Watson played pretty well — as my buddy Steve said, he was the reason the Rock didn't lose by 10 or more. Funniest moment of the game: the Knighthawks gain possession of the ball, and their coach immediately signals the ref for a time-out. The ref blows the whistle and a second or two later, the Knighthawk players, who don't know about the time-out request, score. The goal is waved off.

Finally winter's here! Normally, I'd complain about that, but I'm going skiing this Friday, and I was worried that there wouldn't be enough snow to actually go. But it's been cold enough to make snow for a week now, and Collingwood's gotten some real snow as well, so the conditions should be pretty good. The forecast calls for a high on Friday of -13 — my ideal temperature for skiing is about -6, so it'll be cold, but for my one ski day per year, I can handle it.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

Bonds and Beckham

Barry Bonds says that Mark McGwire (and Pete Rose) should be in the Hall of Fame. Well, of course Bonds thinks that McGwire should be there — if McGwire isn't there because he used steroids, then there's no way Bonds will get there. I posted a while ago about McGwire, and how I didn't know whether he should or should not be in the HOF. Well, I think I've made up my mind now — if I had a vote, I would not vote for him.

It's never been proven beyond a reasonable doubt that McGwire took steroids, but this is not a court of law, so there is no set "burden of proof". And even if steroids were not explicitly banned by MLB, the belief by the general public (thanks Ben Johnson) was that those who used steroids were cheaters. McGwire had already retired, and had broken no baseball rules by taking the drugs, so there were no repercussions if he were to admit taking them, but he still stonewalled the US Congressional inquiry and refused to answer any questions. Why? Because he knew that what he had done was wrong. If he had 'fessed up, I might have had a little more compassion, but he cheated and then lied about it. No! No Hall of Fame for you!

I posted before on why Pete Rose should not be in the Hall, so I won't go over that again. I can't think of two more deserving Hall of Famers than Cal Ripken and Tony Gwynn, so congrats to them.

So the MLS is all about signing older, used-to-be-good-but-not-so-much-now players for insane amounts money now, is it? Then who better than MLSE to own a franchise in that league? They've been doing that with the Leafs for years.

Monday, January 15, 2007

I will choose free will

Scott Adams, the creator of Dilbert, also has a blog, which is one of my favourites. He writes about all sorts of things that don't appear in Dilbert, like politics and religion and stuff. It's usually pretty funny, but he's quite an intelligent guy, so it's frequently thought-provoking as well. One subject that he writes about now and again is free will, or the lack thereof. He believes that free will does not exist. By this he does not mean that everything is predetermined, but that humans cannot control their own actions or decisions. The idea is that given a certain environment and set of inputs, your brain will make a deterministic decision. Basically, free will is an illusion; what really has control over our decisions is simply chemistry, biology, and physics.

I find this to be a fascinating topic, with zillions of implications. For me, the primary implication is that of the law — should a person be found guilty and punished for a crime that he did not explicitly choose to commit? If someone is found not guilty of murder by reason of insanity, the idea is that some defect in his brain meant there was no way for him to make the choice not to kill. There is talk of serial killers whose brains are "wired" to kill, and it is not only inevitable that they will, but unreasonable to expect them to be able to resist. But if there is no free will, then all of our brains are wired in some way — most of us are wired not to kill, but not all. Similarly, most of us are wired not to steal, but not all. Therefore, those who steal (including those who know it's morally wrong) are simply following the instructions wired into their brains — they cannot choose not to. Obviously we have to put people who are "wired" to kill in jail or some kind of hospital, because they pose a danger to society. But what about those park in a no-parking zone — do they deserve to be punished for it, when it could be argued that they did not choose to commit their crime; they are merely a victim of their own brain chemistry?

For my part, I tend to agree with Scott. However, the "illusion" of free will is enough for me. Perhaps it is completely deterministic that given a particular set of circumstances, my brain will make a certain decision, but there's no way to calculate in advance what that decision would be, so my decisions have the appearance of being in my control. This is why you hear people watching people in some difficult situation (on TV or whatever) and saying "I don't know what I'd do in that situation". Well, the answer is essentially hard-wired into your brain, but since there's no way to access it, the fact that the answer is already there is of no use.

In addition, the number of variables that go into a decision is incalculable, so even if you could access it, you couldn't look it up without knowing an unbounded amount of data about the environment and circumstances. And if that weren't enough, you can also throw quantum mechanics and chaos theory into the mix, and now at least some of the variables that have an affect on a decision are essentially random. It boggles the mind.

Aside: Actually, quantum mechanics is itself enough to boggle my mind. I love reading about it, but I generally can't wrap my head around the concepts. I suspect I'm not alone in that respect.

Friday, January 12, 2007

The NeXT Big Thing?

To:All Apple employees
From:  Steve Jobs
Date:January 8, 2017

As you all know, tomorrow is the 10th anniversary of our announcement of the first iPhone, and we are commemorating this event with our biggest announcement yet: the new Apple iBrain cranial implant. Many of you have had the beta implant for a few months now, and if you think down to the 'upgrade' page, you can see the GA upgrade surgery schedule.

The iBrain contains what you'd expect: music and ultra-hi-def video players, hologram projector, satellite videophone, 20 Gigapixel camera, car remote control (thanks to the Segway team for getting that in before the deadline!), and calculator. However, because this device is directly implanted into your brain, it has some very exciting new abilities as well. The iBrain can enhance your memory (imagine remembering what you had for lunch on any given day 10 years ago!) as well as give you vastly improved hearing and vision (up to 20:0.25 on the old scale — remember when people used to improve their vision by actually altering their eyeballs rather than improving the brain's processing of the existing visual signals from the eyes?).

The iBrain upgrade package includes everything in the base package plus some extras like enhancing your senses of smell and taste, the ability to understand what lawyers are talking about, basic car repair, home repair, and welding techniques, and an impressive multimedia library, including every song, book, TV show, and film ever created, as well as the entire contents of youtube.com (thanks to our recent agreement with Google-Microsoft). Just think - if you want to watch some video of last year's "The Who - the Farewell-No-Really-We-Mean-It-This-Time" tour, it's there, as well as every season of "CSI: Toledo", and the top selling albums of 2016: "Daddy Didn't Do Me No Favors" by Prince Jackson, "Greatest Hits Vol. 6" by Paris Hilton, and "I Got Issues" by Britney Timberlake. Thanks to our merger with Nintendo three years ago, the upgrade also includes the new Nintendo W00t! gaming system.

You can also get upgrades for the iBrain at the iStore. Packages include a language pack, giving you full fluency in such languages as English, Japanese, Chinese, Spanish, and L33t, courses and even entire degrees from most accredited North American universities, jiu-jitsu, and the ability to fly a B-212 helicopter.

I also want to mention that the employees who volunteered for alpha testing have been doing very well — most of them can now walk on their own again, and a few have begun to speak! Once again, I cannot stress enough that the use of the phrase "insanely great" is absolutely forbidden in reference to this product.

I want to thank all of our employees for all of their hard work and dedication to this project. Be sure to watch AppleTV next week for our exclusive coverage of President Clooney's Minute Maid State of the Union address brought to you by Allstate.

Steve

Thursday, January 11, 2007

A thinly veiled attempt to increase readership

Mmmmmm-kay. I have exactly two lurkers. You'd think that a blog like this that deals with a fringe sport like lacrosse as well as the day-to-day life of Joe "2.3-kids-a-minivan-and-a-mortgage" Suburbs would get thousands of hits a day, but alas, you'd be wrong. Then again, I don't care about reader numbers, do I?

Seems that the real way to attract blog readers is to (a) be famous (nope), or (b) be an expert in some field and write about that (nope). However, I've seen several blogs about politics, and they always seem to attract the commenters, so maybe I'll try that. Note that I don't really follow politics much, so you might have to fill in some of the blanks here:

Did you read about what <politician> said the other day about <current political issue>? I just can't believe anyone can think that way - those damned <political party>s. Don't they understand that <opposing viewpoint>? Don't they remember <politician from 10-40 years ago>? Have we learned nothing from <scandal>?

OK, that's not working. I guess I'll stick to writing about stuff that I am more familiar with, and hopefully my faithful readers will occasionally find it interesting.

Item: Nicholas had oatmeal for breakfast this morning. I shit you not.

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

National De-lurking Week

Happy National De-lurking Week! (Thanks cahwyguy) For those unfamiliar with the term, a "lurker" is someone who reads a blog (or newsgroup, message board, etc.) but doesn't post anything. This is the time for those who read but don't post comments to expose yourself! Feel free to leave a comment on this article if you're reading it - make it something deep and insightful, or just "hi!".

Just remember:

Thursday, January 04, 2007

Ryan sings the alphabet

Another video of Ryan singing. He's almost three in this one as well.

E I O

My first foray into the world of YouTube! Here's a video of Ryan singing Old McDonald. This was about four years ago - Nicky was only a baby. Ryan couldn't say "farm" properly, so he said "darm". I love how he ponders Gail's animal suggestion before continuing.

Saturday, December 30, 2006

Superheroes and Supervillains

I took a quiz to discover which superhero I'm most like, and found:

Your results:
You are Superman
Superman
60%
Robin
52%
Iron Man
50%
Spider-Man
50%
Green Lantern
50%
Supergirl
50%
The Flash
50%
Catwoman
45%
Hulk
45%
Batman
25%
Wonder Woman
20%
You are mild-mannered, good,
strong and you love to help others.
Click here to take the Superhero Personality Test
Should I be worried that I'm more like Supergirl and Catwoman than Batman?

There was another one to see which super-villain you're most like:

Your results:
You are Dr. Doom
Dr. Doom
41%
Mr. Freeze
35%
The Joker
34%
Lex Luthor
31%
Juggernaut
23%
Green Goblin
23%
Kingpin
22%
Apocalypse
19%
Riddler
18%
Venom
18%
Magneto
17%
Catwoman
17%
Dark Phoenix
14%
Two-Face
11%
Poison Ivy
9%
Mystique
7%
Blessed with smarts and power but burdened by vanity.
Click here to take the "Which Super Villain are you?" quiz...
I'm not even sure I know who Dr. Doom is.

Lacrosse season is back!

I'm watching the first NLL game of the season, broadcast live over the intertubes. Mike Accursi just scored for Rochester, and the Knighthawks now lead the reigning NLL champion Colorado Mammoth 11-10 in the second quarter.

My friend Mike has a nephew, Shawn Williams, who is a great lacrosse player. He was signed by the Toronto Rock in 1999, and Mike got Rock season tickets to watch Shawn. He brought some other friends to a couple of games, and they started to really enjoy the game. In early 2000, they decided to head to a Buffalo-Philadelphia game in Buffalo, and Mike asked if I wanted to go and check it out. I tagged along, though I knew nothing about lacrosse. I was instantly hooked, and when Mike said they were considering expanding their four season tickets to eight for the next season, I told them to count me in. Since then:

  • I have missed only one Toronto home game (because I was on a Caribbean cruise at the time)
  • I've also seen a number of games in Buffalo and a couple in Rochester
  • I run a lacrosse pool for my friends
  • I've edited hundreds of pages on lacrosse (and created about 50) on Wikipedia

I don't think you could say I'm obsessed with lacrosse, but I'm certainly a fan.

Colin Doyle was traded from the Toronto Rock to San Jose the other day, which took the lacrosse world by storm, since Doyle has been one of the top scorers in the league over the last few years, has been named championship game MVP three times, and was league MVP in 2005. (Incidentally, Doyle's page on Wikipedia was one of the ones that I created.) Doyle was traded with another guy (who the Rock acquired in a trade last month) and a draft pick for three young players and a couple of draft picks. One of the players the Rock got was Ryan Benesch, who was the first overall draft pick last year, so the Rock have essentially traded a proven scorer (who's only 29 — likely lots of good years left in his career) for an unproven rookie, though one with lots of potential. I didn't care much for Doyle for the first few years, because he was a bit of a hothead, and tended to dive now and again. Over the last two years or so, however, he's calmed down a lot, and my respect for him has really grown. He also stands perfectly still for the national anthems, and even sings along with O Canada, which impressed the hell out of me the first time I saw it. Long story short, I'm not really sure how I feel about this trade. It's nice to bring some young blood into the team, and the draft picks in 2008 and 2009 may set the Rock up nicely for the next decade. But Colin Doyle was the anchor of the Rock's offense and a bona fide superstar player. If Benesch's potential doesn't pan out (does the name Nik Antropov ring any bells?) this could be the beginning of a number of "rebuilding" years for the Rock.

Friday, December 29, 2006

The Perfect Day

Merry Christmas to all! Christmas at the Perrow household was quite stress-free this year. We always travel to the grandparents' places around Christmas, but we always wake up Christmas morning in our own house. In previous years, we would wake up Christmas morning, open our presents as fast as possible, then pack the kids in the van with one or two of their new toys and head 3-4 hours north to either my parents' place or Gail's dad's place, to be there in time for Christmas dinner. Then we'd do Christmas all over again there, and a day or two later leave that set of grandparents and drive the hour to the other set. A day or two after yet another Christmas, we'd come home to the huge mess that we left.

We only made one change to that schedule this year, but it made a huge difference. We decided not to go north for Christmas dinner, but leave later in the day. As a result, we took our time opening presents, and if the kids wanted to play with something for 10 minutes before opening the next one, no problem. This small change completely killed any time pressure that we felt, and made Christmas Day very enjoyable. However, that's not the perfect day I referred to in the title of this entry. Boxing Day we spent at my in-laws place, and the 27th at my parents' place, and both days were very relaxing and enjoyable, but neither of them was the perfect day either. The perfect day was yesterday, the 28th.

The boys slept until about 7:30, and I got up with them while Gail slept in. Ryan had already made himself a waffle, and I got Nicky some breakfast as well. They watched some TV while I got their clothes and swimming stuff ready, then I drove them over to the YMCA for a "Kitchen Chemistry" class followed by a swim. While they were there, Gail and I cleaned up the family room — moved new toys to the play room or the boys' rooms, collected all the wrapping paper and boxes for recycling, stuff like that. Then I got the boys, and they played happily until lunch time. Lunch was something simple, and then we played a game or two as a family. I got the Scene It: Harry Potter DVD game, and we played that a couple of times. Ryan's seen the first movie once but not the rest, and Nicky hasn't seen any of them, but they enjoyed watching the clips and stuff. After that, Ryan wanted to do one of the puzzles he got for Christmas, and I helped him until he got bored and went to watch TV with Nicholas. Gail and I continued the puzzle until dinner time. We had dinner (leftover turkey, believe it or not), and then watched a TV show on UFOs, aliens and the whole Roswell thing which we all enjoyed (though Gail said the boys were a little freaked out later), and then I went to my friend Jeff's place for an evening of Texas Hold'em poker. The last time I played poker at Jeff's I didn't win a single hand all night. This time I did win some hands (some with fairly big pots) and I came 4th out of 9 people, so I was pretty happy with that.

It wasn't a great day because we got a lot done, or because of any one event, or because the meal was great, or anything like that. It just seemed like the perfect family day — the boys had fun doing things by themselves, with each other, and with us, and we had fun doing stuff with them as well. There was a minimum of fighting, squealing, and yelling (though with our boys, some of that is inevitable), nobody got sent to their room, nobody had to go to bed early because they weren't behaving, it was just a great day all around. The Perfect Day.

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Spam Zen

I received this piece of spam email today:

Subject: I speak?A most harsh one and not.

In a lawful deedAnd lawful.

Where are my other men monsieur?. I have butlittle more to.

Our houseBequeathed down.

I'm sure it means something deep and philosophical, but I can't figure out what.

Monday, December 18, 2006

Harvey Danger rocks

I blogged before about Harvey Danger and their free-as-in-beer CD download. I downloaded the album, liked it, and attempted to buy it, but they charged my credit card without sending my anything. I emailed them about it and they reversed the charge, so I tried again. Once again, they charged my credit card but nothing got sent. I emailed them about it today, and they said that not only would they reverse the second charge, but now they're going to send me a free copy of the CD.

So: I paid nothing to download their album. I liked their idea of releasing the album on the internet (plus I liked the album itself), so I wanted to make sure that the band actually makes a profit from me. But because I had trouble buying the CD, I'm getting a free copy. The end result is that the band will still make no monetary profit from me. How's that for irony?

The best I can do now is to promote the living hell out of the band, so that's what I'm doing here. I will probably buy their other albums as well, but if I do, it'll be from amazon.ca, not from their web site!

Saturday, December 16, 2006

Useless spam

Well, spam is useless anyway, but I seem to be getting a lot of spam recently that has no links, no images, no URLs, nothing. People who send spam, I thought, were generally trying to sell you something - buy my stolen / copied watches, buy my illegal drugs, buy penny stocks (that have already peaked) in my company, check out my porn web site, stuff like that. But if the message contains no way for you to get to their web site, how do they make money off of it?

My family web site has a guest book. Every couple of weeks or so, I get a couple of spam postings, which I promptly delete. This morning I got one from "Bill" (uh-huh) which said (this was the entire text of the message): "Hello, nice site look this:".

Bill, if you're reading this blog, I assure you that I really wanted to "look this", but there was no "this" to "look". My interest was piqued, and then disappointment washed over me like I was a Senators fan during the playoffs. Most of the people who visit perrow.ca are my family, so in order to spare them that level of despair, I deleted your message. I'm sorry, but I have to do what's best for my family.

Friday, December 15, 2006

Raptors game #3

I went to the Raptors game against the New Jersey Nets tonight, my third Raptor game this season. In the first game, the Raptors led 2-0, then Atlanta tied it up and went ahead, and never lost the lead again. In the second game, they had a 2-point lead around 24-22 or so, but then lost the lead and never got it back again. So when the Raptors had a five point lead early in the game, I was pumped. Sure it was only 10-5 maybe 2 minutes in, and sure, this is basketball, where a 10-point lead can vanish within a minute, but still. I was kind of right - the Raps had 12-14 point leads several times, and almost every time, the Nets clawed back to within 1 or 2; they even tied it up at least once. The Raptors persevered (even without CB4), and came out on top, 90-78. Their defence was much better in this game than in the previous two, and I thought (being the basketball novice that I am) that T.J. Ford played really well.

Ex-Raptor Vince Carter was booed every time he touched the ball, and whenever he took a shot and missed, the cheers were louder than when the Raptors scored. One time, Vince even attempted a three-pointer and missed the net, rim, and backboard entirely; the crowd went nuts. Vince — an air ball? Oh, how the mighty have fallen. Vince ended up with a positively mediocre 12 points. Fans were yelling "Carter sucks", and a couple of years ago, I would have been right there with them, but tonight I just didn't feel the hate. He's no longer the slimy bastard who admitted that he gave less than his all for the last year or so of his stay in Toronto, now he's just a guy who used to play here. It's not like he's Roger Clemens or anything. Oh, and Alonzo Mourning, who was traded to the Raptors as part of the Carter deal but told them he would not play, and forced them to buy him out for $10 million, is still a scum-sucking dirtbag.

This was the third major sporting event that I've been to where something exciting happened to the person next to me:

  1. A bunch of years ago, I was sitting in the 500-level of SkyDome during a Jays game with Gail and another couple we knew, Mark and Kathy. We were way out (and I mean way the fuck out) in right field, just inside the foul pole. Mark jokingly mentioned the remote possibility of someone hitting a ball to us and I swear to God, the next batter hit a long foul ball that landed in the empty seat in front of Mark, who grabbed the ball.
  2. At a Rock game a few years ago, my buddy Jeff (with whom I went to the Raptors game tonight) was sitting next to me, and caught a t-shirt thrown from the field.
  3. At every Raptors game (and every Leafs and Rock game too), they pick two fans at random from the upper section and move them down to the front row (it's the "Move of the Game", sponsored by a moving company). Tonight, the chosen two people were sitting right next to me. Man, that would have been suh-weet.

Friday, December 08, 2006

No Lilly, no Meche, now what?

What, exactly, is J.P. Ricciardi thinking? We all knew that the Jays' biggest problem last year was inconsistent pitching. We also knew that other needs were a catcher (both Zaun and Molina are free agents), and help in the middle infield. So what moves has he made? Two good ones (well, not horrible at least), and two bad ones. He resigned Zaun (needed to be done, but we still need a backup and Molina is too expensive) and signed shortstop Royce Clayton, so we're OK up the middle. But he also signed Frank Thomas and Matt Stairs. Great, now our good-hitting lineup is even better, but wasn't pitching the problem in the first place? Is he hoping we will win lots of 9-7 games and just pound our way into the playoffs? Memo to J.P.: you need pitching to win. End of story.

The Jays were not able to re-sign Ted Lilly, and Spier is gone, so the pitching staff is weaker than before, and we've spent something like $9 million on Thomas (Stairs and Clayton were cheap). We were willing to go up to near $10 million for Lilly ($10 million for Ted Lilly? Yeesh), so now we have that money available. They were looking at Gil Meche, but he's said no. Even if they did sign him, they'd have been at best no better than last year. Does J.P.'s plan for getting to the World Series this year really include "Hope that Chacin bounces back, and that Towers, Taubenheim, Janssen, and McGowan suddenly find a way to win 12 games each"?

Couldn't the Lilly money plus the Thomas money have been better used on someone like Barry Zito, or even Andy Pettitte? Maybe he's looking at trading Vernon Wells for a front-line pitcher, but a stud pitcher is worth more than a stud outfielder, so we'd have to throw in prospects as well, and we just ain't got any. In general, I like what Ricciardi has done with the Jays, but these moves have me shaking my head. Then again, the offseason isn't over yet, so maybe it's too early to judge, but so far, next year's team is not looking any better than last year's.

Update: Read in the paper this morning: What's the difference between J.P. Ricciardi and Lindsay Lohan at a bar? Lindsay Lohan can buy pitchers.

Monday, December 04, 2006

Graeme the inventor

While sitting in line at the Tim Horton's drive-thru a couple of weeks ago, getting ready to order the exact same thing that I always order when I don't have breakfast at home ("Sesame seed bagel toasted with butter, large steeped tea, one milk, one sugar, double cup please"), I thought of an idea. It's unlikely to ever happen, but it's cool anyway. The idea is for Tim Horton's to create a small device, something that could hang on a key chain, that functions as a remote control. I'll call it the TimFob. The TimFob could have several buttons on it, and each button could be programmed to a different order — when you get to the drive-thru, you point your TimFob at the ordering window and press one of the buttons. The order is transmitted and placed, and the total immediately appears on the screen. Then you can drive up to the window and pay.

Each TimFob would have a unique ID number, and when a button is pressed, it simply transmits its ID number and which button was pressed, and the computer inside the store checks its database for the order corresponding to that TimFob and button. Customers could set and change their favourite orders on a web site. If they want, customers could also tie their credit card number to the TimFob so that their purchase is automatically paid for. You'd have to make the TimFob easily removable so that people could hang it on their key chains and then use it while their keys are still in the ignition, and then replace it once they've ordered.

Advantages:

  • Obviously, this would speed up ordering, and cut down on errors in data entry (i.e. 1 milk 2 sugars, or was that 2 milk 1 sugar?). One of the Timmy's near us almost always screws up some part of our order. Either Gail's tea isn't decaf (in which case she'll have a headache all day), or my tea has too much / not enough sugar, or the sesame seed bagel has cream cheese and the whole wheat bagel has butter instead of the other way around, or...
  • If the TimFob handled multiple buttons on the same order (and why wouldn't it?), the whole family could place their standard order with a couple of button pushes.
  • You could also grab someone else's TimFob when running to Timmy's for a group and make sure you get what they want.
  • If you wanted something other than one of the preprogrammed orders, the standard drive-thru procedure still works.
  • Tim Horton's could implement some kind of reward program (i.e. buy 10 coffees and get a free donut) without having to have stamp cards or things like that
  • Handy for people who have strong foreign accents!

There are some drawbacks too:

  • Timmy's could then track people's purchases, as well as locations and purchasing habits, and some people may not like this idea (but in that case, don't use the TimFob)
  • If the payment thing is implemented, they'd have to make sure the system is fast — Timmy's currently does not accept credit or debit cards since they frequently have long lines, and credit/debit transactions take longer. I cannot think of any other company that could get away with only accepting cash in this day and age.
  • There are the obvious security issues with having your credit card tied to something that could easily be stolen and then used with absolutely no authentication, but Esso already has that issue with their Speedpass.

Of course, creation of the TimFob would cost Tim Horton's money, and it's not likely that people would pay to use it (though maybe they would if Timmy's offered a discount, or perhaps the aforementioned reward program — people pay for the 407 transponder after all). Their biggest expense might be to pay me for the idea and use of the term "TimFob" which I invented today. (This blog posting and all contents are copyright © 2006, Graeme Perrow. All rights reserved.) Since this idea doesn't really help the company much, just the customer, it's unlikely that they'll do it (call me a cynic). But if they ever do, remember, you read it here first.

Note: No, I am not so arrogant as to believe that I am the first person ever to think of this idea. I'm sure many other people have thought about the same thing — this is my own original idea inasmuch as I've never heard or read anyone else talking about such an idea.

Sunday, December 03, 2006

Blue Man Group

We went to see Blue Man Group in Toronto on Saturday night. In a word, wow. Absolutely undescribably amazing. "Undescribable" is an understatement — it was funny, it was musical, it was percussive, it was interactive, it was messy (for those in the first few rows, called "the poncho section"), it was without a doubt the weirdest experience I've ever had in a theatre. The three Blue Men never break a smile, never speak or make vocal noises of any kind, and yet still manage to convey their messages, which is important when they bring audience members up on stage and want them to do stuff. It's a multimedia extravaganza, with not only music, but everything from paint to marshmallows, Twinkies to Cap'n Crunch, as well as computer animation, pixelboards, laser effects, and multi-coloured PVC tubes all over the place.

I guess it's not for everybody, but everybody we went with loved it. Highly recommended.